This is the first of a series of blog posts about my summer working for SOS or Service Over Self in Memphis, Tennessee. You can check out their website here, if you'd like more information. Please take the time to check it out and see the amazing things they are doing to revitalize the Binghampton section of Memphis and prove to Memphis and specifically Binghampton that God is not through with "The Bing".
It's been about two weeks now since SOS ended and I feel like I've had time to decompress, relax, rest, and really jot down my thoughts about the summer. The first thing I want to speak about as a way I was changed this summer was manliness.
Calvin and Hobbes
As part of SOS, each Thursday a summer staff member gives a short version of their testimony to the campers. I gave my testimony this summer and really focused on the image of God the Father. I grew up with my grandpa as my father figure in my life as my dad had hit the road due to drugs and alcohol. I really found comfort in the idea of God being a father that would never leave me or bail on me the way my natural father did. As I really confronted this idea, I began to realize the effects of culture on men. I'm a member of the United Methodist Church. I love my church, but we have our problems. In the interest of inclusiveness and feminism, we have limited the role of men in the church. I've been passed over for or encouraged not to apply for leadership positions because I'm a white male and therefore don't offer the diversity of other candidates. This is not necessarily the churches fault but a reflection of culture. While feminism offered many great advances in American society, it has and continues to reshape how men act and behave. In our society today it is more socially acceptable for a man to wear skinny jeans and listen to Miley Cyrus than it is for a man to grow a beard. I've decided to grow my beard just because I wish to see how it will look when given room to grow, but I've gotten strange looks and comments from people. "You look like a caveman" a female friend told me. What I learned this summer from living in close quarters with 20+ other godly men, is that it is completely acceptable to just be a man sometimes. Now to understand why this is a big deal you need to understand this. In the course of theological conversation with a fellow Methodist, she stated she felt it was sinful and idolatrous to worship God as either male or female. This summer, while I already knew that God created man and God created woman it was reinforced by just spending time with my brothers. It was okay to sing "manly" songs of worship. It was okay to build a blow gun and use it on a can of shaving cream. It was okay to go to
Central BBQ and pig out on some BBQ nachos. It was okay to go see a movie with guns and explosions without hearing "it's too violent". It's okay to go to dirt track races and cheer for sprint cars as they zoom around the track. It's okay to just hang out with the guys. Now I'm not saying those things wouldn't be allowed in church (obviously I've never used a blow gun in church). What I'm saying is we live in a society today constantly trying to blur the lines. This is not just gender wise but in all aspects. Some of those lines need to be blurred. The lines that divide activities as being white/black activities such as dirt track racing need to be blurred. However, along the way we must not loose track of the fact God created us all different and we should be unafraid to live into that role. Similarly we as the church, the Body and Bride of Christ must be unafraid to allow people to be themselves. We must allow men to be men and women to be women.We must move to a place where men who love Jesus can love Jesus and still enjoy things that society deems too manly. We must move to a place where we simply choose the best person for the job regardless of male/female, black/white, single/married. Some may say "I'm comfortable in my masculinity, that I don't need to express it like that". I'm comfortable in my masculinity as well, but I still desire fellowship with other men where I can be unafraid to be myself and enjoy the things I enjoy without society telling me I'm wrong. So to the men I served alongside with this summer, I thank you for being the outstanding godly men you were and offering the male fellowship that I needed to grow this summer.
Interesting. Until you compared a beard to skinny jeans I hadn't really thought about the culture changes of acceptibility. It would be nice to think about an activity (such as racing) without judgement or pre-conceived notions. I will try and do better.
ReplyDelete"We must move to a place where we simply choose the best person for the job regardless of male/female, black/white, single/married."
I love diversity. I believe we need it and can benefit from it. But, depending on the job, I want the person who will be the best. In the places where diversity is specifically needed let's make it count. Don't say there are 30 positions to be filled and after 20 elections look at the make-up and then speak about diversity. Can we give specific numbers for each group that is needed?
If we keep talking as if diversity is a problem (and it may be until an older generation dies) then we will continue to have the problem. Diversity no longer ends with race, age or gender. We break it down further. I believe we need young adults who have children on some committees. We say we want to be intentional so let's be intentional and say what we need (5 men, 6 women, etc).
Agreed. We need a greater diversity in all levels, but I don't believe in sacrificing quality for the sake of diversity. I think that's something our country has done that has forced us to take such a tragic turn. Companies are now run by people who aren't mainly the best to be running that company but knew the right people. It's very frustrating to be in a situation where you are the better qualified candidate but someone who is more diverse than you is close enough that the added perk of their diversity is good enough to surpass your superior skill set. It's happened to me along race, age, and sex lines before where I was more qualified but as a young white male was passed over for someone less fitted for the job but who was more diverse. The beard conversation is a favorite one to have. I wish more men appreciated the value of a beard, but beards are a very important sign on the roadmap that is changing cultural norms.
ReplyDeleteGod used some weird dudes to change the world. We should let them be dudes. :)
ReplyDelete