Service To Myself:Reflections from SOS:Wealth and Affluence

This is the second of a series of blog posts about my summer working for SOS or Service Over Self in Memphis, Tennessee. You can check out their website here, if you'd like more information. Please take the time to check it out and see the amazing things they are doing to revitalize the Binghampton section of Memphis and prove to Memphis and specifically Binghampton that God is not through with "The Bing".

What are these strange things above this post you might ask? Well those are food stamps. Many people have never seen them as the US government has now switched to an EBT card that folks use to pay for food when they are on SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) or welfare. The image of these are burned into my mind as a reminder of where I came from. While I would be considered middle class now, it is only through the hard work of my mother that we are in fact middle class. It wasn't always that way though. From the time I was born until I was about 8ish I didn't know what regular Christmas was. Very few presents I got came from a place other than Dollar General or Family Dollar. I still vividly remember being at Winn-Dixie with my mother as she bought groceries for us and paid with those stamps with the all too familiar Liberty Bell on them. I say that to reveal one of my greatest struggles that reared it's ugly head this summer. Money and Affluence. Money is not a real issue for me. I don't have a lot but I have enough and work hard for it as does my family. However, I realized this summer while at SOS I really struggle with people of affluence. Many of the campers who come to SOS are suburban white upper to upper middle class kids. Many of the kids come from families with money who live in the wealthy suburbs of cities they come from. I realized this summer as one kid refused to follow the "Serve to Your Left" rule (at SOS you always serve food to the person to your left at dinner) that he had never been told no. He had seemingly always been allowed to do what he wanted when he wanted. There was a sense of entitlement. The words of my grandfather often ring through my head, "The world owes you nothing and there's nothing worth having that you don't have to work for". God began to reveal in me my struggles with people of affluence and wealth. I harbored resentment towards people who were given everything they ever wanted and had allowed that to mold them into people who felt they were entitled. I began to be shown the resentment I harbored in my heart even towards these campers simply because their parents had enough money they could go to the store, point something out, and have absolutely no problem paying for it. I also began to feel shame for how I grew up even though it was no fault of my own. I felt shame upon realizing these things for multiple reasons. One, I had undervalued the life God had given me. While life has never been easy, there are many moments that have shaped me into the person I am today. Two, I was being judgemental towards campers because of something that was no fault of their own. It wasn't the campers fault they were entitled and affluent. That is a learned condition. Their parents through not forcing them to work for the things they wanted and valued had created a sense of entitlement and superiority in these children. It was through this time that God not only showed me to be thankful for the life I've had and the lessons it has taught me, but that the church has work to do. The words of Mother Theresa ring true when she  “The spiritual poverty of the Western World is much greater than the physical poverty of our people". While God does not necessarily frown upon wealth, we must as the church be diligent in encouraging those with the means to use the gifts God has given them to reinvest in the world. We must also do it not only with the intention of it being a checkmark, but as an outpouring of the grace God has shown us in our lives. We have to show people that you come to SOS to serve God and serve others before yourself. The title Service Over Self is not just a catchy name that rhymed with SOS but a response to the commandment of Christ that "anyone who would follow me must deny himself and take up his cross daily"(Paraphrase of Luke 9:23). For these kids and their parents, it means not only coming to SOS but committing to using your means to serve the least, the last, and the lost that Jesus Christ came to save (Luke 19:10). It means not being so poor that all they have is money. For me it means living into the life and the story God has given me and being thankful for it. It means spending my time educating and preventing people from falling into spiritual poverty while they maintain material wealth. It means realizing we are all broken and live in some kind of poverty.

In Christ
-Shawn

Service To Myself: Reflections From SOS: Being Manly

This is the first of a series of blog posts about my summer working for SOS or Service Over Self in Memphis, Tennessee. You can check out their website here, if you'd like more information. Please take the time to check it out and see the amazing things they are doing to revitalize the Binghampton section of Memphis and prove to Memphis and specifically Binghampton that God is not through with "The Bing". 

    It's been about two weeks now since SOS ended and I feel like I've had time to decompress, relax, rest, and really jot down my thoughts about the summer. The first thing I want to speak about as a way I was changed this summer was manliness.

Calvin and Hobbes

As part of SOS, each Thursday a summer staff member gives a short version of their testimony to the campers. I gave my testimony this summer and really focused on the image of God the Father. I grew up with my grandpa as my father figure in my life as my dad had hit the road due to drugs and alcohol. I really found comfort in the idea of God being a father that would never leave me or bail on me the way my natural father did. As I really confronted this idea, I began to realize the effects of culture on men. I'm a member of the United Methodist Church. I love my church, but we have our problems. In the interest of inclusiveness and feminism, we have limited the role of men in the church. I've been passed over for or encouraged not to apply for leadership positions because I'm a white male and therefore don't offer the diversity of other candidates. This is not necessarily the churches fault but a reflection of culture. While feminism offered many great advances in American society, it has and continues to reshape how men act and behave. In our society today it is more socially acceptable for a man to wear skinny jeans and listen to Miley Cyrus than it is for a man to grow a beard. I've decided to grow my beard just because I wish to see how it will look when given room to grow, but I've gotten strange looks and comments from people. "You look like a caveman" a female friend told me. What I learned this summer from living in close quarters with 20+ other godly men, is that it is completely acceptable to just be a man sometimes. Now to understand why this is a big deal you need to understand this. In the course of theological conversation with a fellow Methodist, she stated she felt it was sinful and idolatrous to worship God as either male or female. This summer, while I already knew that God created man and God created woman it was reinforced by just spending time with my brothers. It was okay to sing "manly" songs of worship. It was okay to build a blow gun and use it on a can of shaving cream. It was okay to go to Central BBQ and pig out on some BBQ nachos. It was okay to go see a movie with guns and explosions without hearing "it's too violent". It's okay to go to dirt track races and cheer for sprint cars as they zoom around the track. It's okay to just hang out with the guys. Now I'm not saying those things wouldn't be allowed in church (obviously I've never used a blow gun in church). What I'm saying is we live in a society today constantly trying to blur the lines. This is not just gender wise but in all aspects. Some of those lines need to be blurred. The lines that divide activities as being white/black activities such as dirt track racing need to be blurred. However, along the way we must not loose track of the fact God created us all different and we should be unafraid to live into that role. Similarly we as the church, the Body and Bride of Christ must be unafraid to allow people to be themselves. We must allow men to be men and women to be women.We must move to a place where men who love Jesus can love Jesus and still enjoy things that society deems too manly. We must move to a place where we simply choose the best person for the job regardless of male/female, black/white, single/married.  Some may say "I'm comfortable in my masculinity, that I don't need to express it like that". I'm comfortable in my masculinity as well, but I still desire fellowship with other men where I can be unafraid to be myself and enjoy the things I enjoy without society telling me I'm wrong. So to the men I served alongside with this summer, I thank you for being the outstanding godly men you were and offering the male fellowship that I needed to grow this summer.